Onions waiting for a knife with "operatic ambitions" and a shoe lost to "domestic mythology" are highly relatable, vivid images.
Phrases like "a mutinous bag of cables" and "paintbrushes stiff with old intention" perfectly capture human procrastination and unfinished projects.
The line about damp clothes "developing a philosophy and possibly a small republic" is brilliant, absurd, and deeply funny.
The poem shifts beautifully from the comedic clutter of life to the deep, emotional anchors that actually hold us here.
The transition to "love has not finished making an absolute nuisance of me" changes the stakes. Bringing in the new child with "the whole astonished future folded inside her fist," the faces not kissed enough, and the soup unmade grounds the defiance in genuine love and regret rather than just stubbornness.
Describing the body as "difficult, faithless in places, miraculous in others" feels profoundly honest. It acknowledges aging or illness without giving up, celebrating the fact that this flawed physical form still successfully "dragged me here, to this ridiculous bar."
Girl this is beautiful.
I love your imagery of domestic chaos.
Onions waiting for a knife with "operatic ambitions" and a shoe lost to "domestic mythology" are highly relatable, vivid images.
Phrases like "a mutinous bag of cables" and "paintbrushes stiff with old intention" perfectly capture human procrastination and unfinished projects.
The line about damp clothes "developing a philosophy and possibly a small republic" is brilliant, absurd, and deeply funny.
The poem shifts beautifully from the comedic clutter of life to the deep, emotional anchors that actually hold us here.
The transition to "love has not finished making an absolute nuisance of me" changes the stakes. Bringing in the new child with "the whole astonished future folded inside her fist," the faces not kissed enough, and the soup unmade grounds the defiance in genuine love and regret rather than just stubbornness.
Describing the body as "difficult, faithless in places, miraculous in others" feels profoundly honest. It acknowledges aging or illness without giving up, celebrating the fact that this flawed physical form still successfully "dragged me here, to this ridiculous bar."
Girl. This is beautiful.❤️
I think I’m going to cry really oh thank you
I wanted to let you know I included this piece in my weekly roundup. I really liked this and wanted to share. Here is the link to my roundup if you’d like to take a look: https://fiztrainer.substack.com/p/what-stayed-with-me-week-of-june.
Oh thank you so much
You’re welcome!
WOW! You write superbly! This is brilliant!
That is so kind thank you
You’re so welcome! 🤗